The Gastronomist Manifesto

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Tuna Burger – Time Is of the Essence!!!

So the other day I came home hungry after a busy day of work and a tough workout. My stomach was crying for food like the revolutionaries of the Paris Commune cried for freedom. As a rule I do not keep any sort of snacks in my house except apples, carrots and the like; by forcing myself to take the time to cook I avoid the temptation to mindlessly stuff myself. But this situation I was in called for an expedient solution–no time to wait 40 minutes for brown rice to cook!

Solution (fast, healthy and utterly satisfying):

tuna burger sandwich

It’s a tuna burger. It couldn’t be easier, cheaper or much better for you. Takes little time for a nice, juicy payback.

1. Open a can o’ tuna and drain it. I just pressed the lid of the can down hard, inverted over the sink. Add the tuna pieces to a bowl.

2. Finely mince some onion, like a couple tablespoons, or if you don’t like onions, don’t. Pick a vegetable you do like, picky-puss. Add to tuna. Next comes a little wheat germ for body and nutrition, 1/4-1/3 cup. And you’re going to want a little heat too, right? Srirachi squirts (my choice), Tabasco sauce, horseradish, spicy mustard or black pepper all love canned tuna.

3. Add one egg yolk. When I made this for myself it had almost the consistency of a crab cake* rather than a patty. The egg is necessary to hold everything together while keeping it moist when you cook it. *That is to say, crumbly.

4. Add flour. How much? Depends on how well-drained the tuna is and how much glue-y power you require. Add in small batches and gently fold with your hands until you can form a fishy mass that holds in one piece. You can use non-wheat flour if you’re gluten intolerant, just remember while it will absorb extra moisture it wont have the same binding effect.

5. Fry your burger in a little olive oil over a med-high heat. For me, the point was to get a crust and sturdy outside shell, not to cook through. If you’re worried about under-cooked egg, go with a lower heat. The tuna, obviously, is cooked. About 4 minutes a side. Note: While this *could* be adapted for the grill, don’t try it with this recipe. You’ll just end up with tuna rubble on charcoal.

6. If you reserved the egg whites when you separated your egg, you might consider cooking them in the pan when the burger’s done for a topping.

7. Assemble sandwich on bread or a bun, top with your fixin’s and condiments of choice.

Don’t be a slave to the capitalist system! Don’t be a slave to your kitchen either.

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